Two years ago, on July 28th, I had my regular colonoscopy on the five year rotation. The doctor found a 2.5 centimeter growth down near the rectum, a tumor which I later named Tommy. There never were any symptoms like bleeding or pain, except for a few instances where the degraded sphincter gave way before I could make it to the toilet. That I ascribed to impending old age or too much coffee.
I went through radiation and oral chemo that seemed to destroy Tommy. My surgeon still wanted to go in and perform a permanent colostomy and removal of the anus, just as a safety precaution. My wife and I ended up firing the surgeon and going with the oncologist to follow a protocol called “Watchful Waiting”. This involved frequent testing and scoping, and a second round of IV chemo that made the first round seem like a tea party. Chemotherapy is the practice of poisoning the cancer slightly more than the patient. There were some days that I felt like I was taking the brunt of the attacks.
By February I was finished. We went into Watchful Waiting mode.
By May, Tommy the Tumor was back.
One year ago, on July 28th, I went in for surgery to have my anus and rectum removed and my gut replumbed to exit just to the left of my belly button. A self adhesive bag with a carbon filter collects the gas and feces. I’ve named my stoma “Cujo”, because the first week after surgery, all it did was bark. Horror/comedy, you know?
My stoma and I have come to an accomodation. I can change the bag and clean the site in approximately a minute. I now have the super power of being able to poop in the middle of a business call without mess or embarrassment. Can’t doing anything about the barking, having no sphincter to clench.
Tomorrow, I have my first colonoscopy with my stoma. The colon is still intact & needs checked. I get to go through the prep same as before, but I have a new two-piece bag to collect the expected torrent of liquified stool that comes of the fluid cleanse. It looks like a condom for an elephant.
So, I go through the next 36 hours with a certain amount of dread and curiosity as we all discover what my colon might have in store for us. Despite all the discomfort and inconvenience, I recommend everyone I know in my age bracket to go through the procedure when required. Colorectal cancer is a bastard that can sneak up on you and bite you in the ass.
Weirdmaste