‘She whose feet must never touch the ground’ seemed determined to live up to her name. Slowly, she lifted a dainty foot over the edge of the platform…
Just as they’d hoped, Captain Catastrophe, Joe and Odi were welcomed with open arms by the locals, who were generous and friendly and almost as warm as their beautiful sunshine island. Amongst the first to greet them was a thickset man in a colourful sarong called Abihu, whom the Captain took to be their leader. Abihu and his family helped the new arrivals build a hut from branches and palms before inviting them to their own dwelling for a lavish feast of pork, fish, sweet potatoes and every sort of fruit imaginable.
“Yum!” enthused Odi after his second helping of pork encased in crispy crackling. “I think I’m going to settle here really well!”
Perhaps what made this island so special was the absence of Mr. Smyle. During excursions to other atolls round the oceans through which his space-age vessel swaggered imperiously, Mr. Smyle took total charge of everything and none of the children could wander at will unless a posse of aides was on hand to watch over them – discreetly, of course. But here, Joe and Odi felt freer than at any time since Babel snatched them into its evil bowels, and, as they raced laughing along the shoreline, chasing the waves and splashing each other gleefully, both boys remembered what fun simply being a child could be. For his part, Captain Bob kept busy mending his boat, chugging backwards and forwards in the dinghy with bits of wood and other materials for the purpose, and occasionally waving to the boys as he carried out his tasks.
Abihu’s English was limited, but between draughts of fizzy coconut milk, he made it clear the boys were to consider the island as home. Food was plentiful; apart from the abundance of fish, fruit and vegetables grew wild, while birds, goats and pigs wandered through surrounding trees without a care in the world until the humans got hungry!
In the evening, the whole village would sit around a fire, roasting the day’s catch, chatting merrily amongst themselves or singing at the top of their voices. This reminded Joe of Fernilee and with a pang he’d wonder how Roots was getting on and that in turn reminded him of Mum and Dad, Miles and Alice; otherwise, he felt happier than he had in months. After a particularly enjoyable day, he lay back to admire the stars, which were sparkling brighter than he’d ever seen.
Catching his friend’s mood, Odi scraped the last flake of crayfish from his bowl and he too lay back contentedly, clasping his hands behind his neck. They both gazed upwards in perfect silence for some time, awe-struck by the heavens’ sheer majesty. “Know what?” Odi sighed, “I could stay here forever but, as soon as I get comfortable with a place, something always happens to mess things up, so maybe we should think of the downside of being here.”
They thought and thought and thought and finally concluded that, no matter how hard they tried to come up with one, there simply wasn’t a downside after all, and, by the warm glow of the fire, surrounded by warm, happy people, began to drift effortlessly to sleep.
Captain Bob had already been snoring for some time. In fact, he tended to drop off so frequently, the villagers had put up a special hammock for him in their communal hut, thus saving him the bother of having to move to his own dwelling for the night. Unlike the boys, he was far too heavy to carry.
A loud blast of a horn, however, sent him flying off the hammock and he almost landed in the fire, grunting in his sleep. “Open ‘chutes!” he yelled, “we’re in a dive!” Joe and Odi shot up, their own dreams disturbed by the fanfare, to see all the villagers bowing to a tall, lean stranger dressed in long robes and a weird sort of turban. He was accompanied by several minions
“Greetings, most highly favoured ones!” The tall man gestured for everyone to rise before seating himself in the chair vacated by Abihu. “I have been sent to summon you to the Exquisite One. ‘She whose feet must never touch the ground’ will be arriving here at first light, favouring you with her presence at the temple. You will, of course, be there.”
“Who’s the Exquisite One when she’s at home?” asked Odi. The tall man turned to stare at him as though the boy was from a previously undiscovered species. “’She whose feet must never touch the ground’ is always at home, wherever in the universe she graces with her presence. And who, may I ask makes so bold as to enquire about her in that disrespectful manner?”
“My name’s…..” But Captain Bob interrupted him. “Might be as well to stay incognito just for now,” he whispered, then drew himself up to his full height and puffed out his chest to address the stranger. “Let me introduce myself. I’m Bob Craddock, Captain of the Mersey May,” he said, “And who might you be?”
“Salutations,” replied the visitor. “I am Nimros, High Priest, devoted to the humble service of ‘She whose feet must never touch the ground’, on whose behalf I command you and your party to attend her at the temple.”
“Thanks very much, but we’ll be far too busy working on my boat, which is why we came here in the first place.”
“No!” boomed the visitor. “It is forbidden for any work to take place on the Island until ‘She whose feet must never touch the ground’ has departed.” Bristling at the word ‘forbidden’, the Captain snorted derisively. ”Oh really!” he bellowed, “We’ll see about that!”
“Tomorrow,” Nimros insisted, “you will pay homage to the Exquisite One at the temple.” Captain Bob was about to tell this Nimros chappie exactly what he thought of that idea, when the High Priest gave another imperious wave of his hand and turned to leave.
“Until dawn!” he concluded, “All must attend, or be cursed for ever!” Then he and his escort were gone, leaving Abihu, who just the previous day had wrestled with a shark, visibly trembling. “Well, I’ll be blowed!” huffed the Captain, “Get your stuff together boys. We’re leaving right now. I’m not having that pompous pipe cleaner tell me when to come and go!”
“Please, Captain!” begged Abihu in his faltering English, “You stay. Come temple, please. ‘She feet not touch ground’ very angry. Stay. Must. Big trouble us you going. We good you, no? Now you good us. Stay.”
“You have to admit the guy’s got a point,” suggested Odi. “I wouldn’t want them getting in trouble on our account. Besides, I’m curious to meet this ‘She whose feet must never touch the ground’ person. I’d like to know why she can’t afford shoes like everybody else.”
“On the other hand,” mused the Captain, “the fewer people who see you two boys, the less chance there is of Elymas finding out you’re still alive. If that happens, Lord knows what he’ll do!”
“Anyway, I don’t want to see this S’quisite One!” Joe blurted out. “I want to leave right now!”
“Why?” asked Odi. “This is the closest we’ve been to paradise in our lives. I’m not going because of some stupid girl” Abihu gasped. “Odi no, not say ‘stupid’. Bad word. Captain Bob, you tell, tell boys no bad words say. You stay, okay?” He grabbed Bob by the arm and stared at him imploringly. “Bad things happen if go. Stay must!”
“I’ve no time for this superstitious nonsense…..!” The Captain began, then, realising just how anxious Abihu was, sighed wearily. “Oh, very well. Don’t worry, we’ll stay.”
“And go in temple?” pressed Abihu and was rewarded by a reluctant nod. Joe scowled. Okay, so they had to meet the S’quisite One or whatever she called herself, so there was no point making a big deal of it. And, in a funny sort of way, he was a little curious.
“Just who is she, anyway?” asked Joe.
“That’s what I intend to find out,” said the Captain. “Meanwhile, you two get your heads down.” Captain Bob suggested. “I need to talk to Abihu in private.”
It was some time before the Captain arrived at the hut, feeling weary and a little put out to find Joe and Odi still awake.
“Well?” they asked, expectantly.
“As I thought,” the Captain began, “Complete hogwash!”
“Tell us!” begged the boys. “Please, Captain Bob, or we’ll never get to sleep.”
“Oh, very well,” he sighed, “It’s as good a bedtime story as any other, I suppose. Apparently, there’s an ancient legend about a goddess who was so perfect, so exquisite, that the other gods never got any work done because all they wanted to do was gaze at her all day. So, the top god, whoever that was, covered her with cloud to stop anyone looking at her but, as a reward to his faithful worshipers, he allows her to reappear and grace the world with her beauty.”
“She must be really old by now!” said Joe.
“That depends on whether you believe in reincarnation or not. This Exquisite One is supposed to get re-born every hundred years or so, and believers go searching for her.”
“How do they know when they’ve found her?” asked Joe.
“That’s easy!” Odi chipped in. “’Cos she’s so cute, right?”
“That’s the general idea,” replied the Captain. “Physically perfect, without a flaw. And there’s something else; Legend has it that this goddess, the Exquisite One, will only stay perfect for as long as she avoids treading on anything that grows – hence the title ‘She whose feet must never touch the ground’.”
“So how does she get about, then?” asked Odi, practical as ever. “Does someone have to carry her everywhere? Does she have a crane?”
“She is carried everywhere by six young women, all veiled, on a litter of refined gold, the only substance which her feet can touch. And, rumour has it,” the Captain lowered his voice and beckoned to the boys to move closer so no one else could hear, “she can walk on air!”
“Wow!” the boys gasped. “Like…float, you mean?”
Captain Bob began to chuckle. “Well, that remains to be seen, but who knows? After a barrel of rum, you can even see elephants fly!”
“But can she really walk on air?” Odi persisted thinking this was one skill he’d dearly like to learn himself.
Captain Bob glanced at him sharply. “Like I said, complete hogwash. Now, if you boys will excuse me…..”
Within seconds, he began to snore.
Next morning, everyone woke to the sound of horns as a flotilla of boats approached the island. Joe and Odi joined the villagers as they ran onto the beach to welcome their guest, ‘She whose feet must never touch the ground’. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to identify her boat. Overlaid with gold, it carried a litter screened by red silk curtains, flanked by six veiled women, three on each side, who stood up as the craft drew onto the beach. Grabbing the handles of the litter, the women heaved it up onto their shoulders and carried it ashore, followed by a procession of people in vivid robes and jewelled head-dresses. Truly, it was a stunning sight to see, and even Captain Bob’s jaw hung open.
The procession continued up a steep path towards the temple, an impressive white building supported by columns and elaborately carved with every kind of animal you could think of.
At the entrance stood the tall man who had so annoyed Captain Bob the previous night, now sporting a gold tube on his head with an intricate carving on it, which, at a glance, looked like a dragon. He bowed reverently as the litter approached, then turned and led the way into the temple, accompanied by the horns and other musical instruments. The villagers were already inside the temple, and they all bowed to the Exquisite One now being carried towards the raised platform at the far end of the building. Joe and Odi were pushed towards the side of the temple, Odi complaining he couldn’t see properly, whereas Joe was glad to be out of sight.
Once at the platform, the tall man, who was obviously a priest of some kind, gestured to the women to put the litter down. Then the curtain was removed and the whole assembly (except for the boys and Captain Bob) threw themselves onto their knees with adoring cries. Joe and Odi strained their eyes to catch a glimpse of the Exquisite One, curious to know whether she was indeed as beautiful as promised, but from that distance, it was difficult to see anything other than a tiny, doll-like figure overwhelmed by the gorgeous materials that enveloped it. The face had been painted beyond recognition; eyes ringed with black kohl and metallic shadow of a most peculiar hue; lips formed into a rosebud of brilliant crimson. Not even a wisp of hair was on view, due to the close-fitting golden crown with its halo of jewelled spikes. ‘She whose feet must never touch the ground’ was now perched on the edge of the platform, which began to rise above the assembly to a height of 20ft or more and, as soon as her litter was in place, a beam of light from a window opposite bathed her in glory, causing the tips of her crown to sparkle impressively. “Wow!!” gasped Odi, his eyes like saucers, “I’m going to take a closer look.”
“Odi, come back!” Joe whispered, “It isn’t safe!” But his friend wasn’t listening. All Joe could do was watch Odi weaving through the crowd to the front.
Just then, Joe noticed something. His attention having been drawn away from the dazzling figure of the girl, he squinted upwards and picked out a carving on the ceiling just over the Exquisite One’s head. Joe’s stomach churned. He wanted to scream, but his mouth wouldn’t open. He wanted to close his eyes, but they remained open, transfixed by the horrible image of a three-horned dragon.
Frantically, he turned towards Captain Bob, but the Captain was some yards away and there were too many people between them, while Odi, now hidden from view, had pushed his way to the platform.
Wildly, Joe jerked his head from side to side, looking for a door, looking for an exit, looking for a hole down which to hide, but there was no escape from the nightmare. And all the time, soundlessly, inside his head, the boy was screaming, screaming so much, he didn’t hear the fanfare. Didn’t hear the incantation of the priest. Didn’t hear the bells summoning unnatural forces to the temple.
Suddenly, there was silence. Everyone in the temple focused on the small idol as she rose to her feet and folded her arms across her chest. She stood for several minutes, as if in a trance, breathing slowly and deeply, before inching forward on a golden carpet which had been specially laid at her feet. And the light faded….
That’s when Joe began to talk to Mr. Big.
‘She whose feet must never touch the ground’ seemed determined to live up to her name. Slowly, she lifted a dainty foot over the edge of the platform and throughout the temple all mouths gaped, all breathing stopped. From her high position above the throng, the revered Exquisite One began to walk on air.
“Please, please, Mr. Big. Please help us! Please get us out of here!” begged Joe silently. Whatever sinister event was about to take place, he wanted no part of. He felt an indescribable evil that reached down, into his marrow.
Suddenly, a piercing shriek resounded through the temple. Having stepped off the platform, ‘She whose feet must never touch the ground’ now lay in a crumpled heap on the cold, hard and unforgiving floor. Unbroken, such a fall could have broken every bone in her small body, but fortunately (for her at least!), she’d landed on Odi who’d been standing just below her. For several moments, the girl lay holding her ankle and whimpering in pain. Whatever force had propelled her had now disappeared, taking her ‘perfection’ along with it.
Those who had come to worship looked at each other in astonishment, shocked at seeing their Exquisite One brought low in such an undignified manner. Nimros, red-faced and furious, snarled through his teeth, telling the Exquisite One to ‘Get up!’ His watery eyes scoured the temple until eventually, they rested on a white-blond head. Shaking with rage, he pointed to where Joe was crouching.
“Seize him!” he commanded, and everyone turned, including the women who had carried the litter. They all lifted their veils to reveal pale, cold faces, but there was one crueller than the rest. She followed the direction of the priest’s outstretched finger, craning her neck to see who or what had caused this disaster. Fortunately, Joe had seen her first and he crawled between dozens of legs until he managed to reach the Captain.
“Captain Bob!” he whispered, “It’s Sister Prism!”
Immediately, the Captain threw Joe over his shoulder, fireman-style, and set off through the crowded temple, shoving everyone out of his way. “Don’t worry, Joe! She’ll not harm you while I’m here! Abihu!”
Abihu was standing, open-mouthed, unable to make head nor tail of the scene he’d witnessed. “Abihu!” The Captain insisted. “Find Odi! We have to get back to the boat!”
Still confused yet sensing danger, Abihu made his way towards Odi. Meanwhile, Captain Bob left the temple and, with Joe still across his shoulders, ran towards the cove where he kept his dinghy.
The temple was in chaos. The villagers were milling around, murmuring, wondering what was happening. The priest, Prism and her fellow Nunjas were yelling at the villagers to “Stop the foreigners!” but no one took any notice and just hung around, getting in the way.
Then Prism saw Odi. “You!” she bawled at the top of her voice and swooped down on him with a vengeance. But Abihu intercepted her and, by the time she managed to push past him, Odi had disappeared.
With Prism’s screams of rage still ringing in their ears, Captain Bob and Joe started dragging the dinghy towards the rocks where they could hide while waiting for Odi. “Let’s hope he’s all right,” said the Captain. “The sooner we get off this island, the better.”
“Couldn’t we just hide here until the Nunjas have gone?” asked Joe.
“No,” Captain Bob replied. “As soon as Prism reports back to Elymas, he’ll be able track us by satellite. Our only hope is to get as far out to sea as possible.” Then Joe had an uncomfortable thought. “What about the Mersey May?” he said. “Prism’s bound to see it, and if she gets to it first…..”
“That mustn’t happen!” cried the Captain. “Confound it! Where is that boy!” Just then, they heard someone running, footsteps pounding along the shore. Joe popped his head up from behind a rock to see. “It’s Odi!” he exclaimed, “and there’s someone with him!”
“Get in, Joe!” Captain Bob pulled the cord on the outboard motor as hard as he could. Nothing happened. He tried again. Still nothing.
Odi arrived, his heart pounding and, close behind him, was a young girl. “What’s she doing here?” Joe demanded.
“Never mind!” boomed the Captain. “No time for explanations; just get in quickly!” Odi and his companion climbed aboard while Captain Bob continued to pull the cord, trying frantically to get the motor going.
“They went that way! Follow the footsteps!” It was Prism, arriving on the beach with her fellow nunjas, all shrieking in their high-pitched voices.
“Oh, please start! Please start!” cried Joe, and Odi joined in the refrain. “Please, please, please!” Neither boy ever wanted to fall into Prism’s hands again, but they could hear her voice getting louder and still the outboard motor wouldn’t start.
The nunjas were just a few metres away when, at last, there was a phut – a faint phut, but a definite phut nonetheless. “Please, please, please….!” The boys chanted and then, suddenly, miraculously, the motor burst into life just as Prism was pelting round the rock. She dived into the sea and, with a yell of triumph, grabbed the rope which had tethered the dinghy. “Oh no you don’t!” she growled. “You’re not going anywhere!”
“Oh yes we are!” cried Captain Bob. He pulled out a large Bowie knife and with one swift motion, sliced through the rope to unleash the dinghy, which shot off at speed. Prism floundered backwards into the water, drenched by the spray.
“Hurray!” yelled Joe and Odi.
“Don’t celebrate yet!” warned Captain Bob. “Wait until we reach the Mersey May.” Prism was not prepared to give her prey. “To the boats, the boats!” she shrieked, and the nunjas pelted along the beach to where their ceremonial canoes lay waiting. “They’ll never catch us with those!” crowed Odi. “Get paddling, you nasty old nunjas!” And he started pulling faces and making ungentlemanly gestures.
But the nunjas didn’t need to start paddling. To Odi’s horror, no sooner had the women leaped into one of the canoes than the roar of a powerful engine could be heard. How powerful, it was difficult to tell, but they certainly weren’t phutting! “O-oh” said Odi. “Looks like we’ll have to go faster, Captain Bob!”
“This won’t go any faster, Odi” the Captain replied. “Let’s just pray we get there first!” And pray they did, Odi, Joe and their new companion. “Please, please, please, please, please….” They were now within yards of the Mersey May, but Prism and her crew were steaming up at an angle and seemed certain to reach there before them. “I’ll have to delay them!” declared Captain Bob. “Odi! Joe! Consider yourselves promoted. I want you to take over the tub. Joe! Start the engine. Odi! Weigh anchor. ”I’m going to deal with some unwanted passengers!”
Pulling alongside the Mersey May, long enough for the youngsters to climb aboard, the Captain sped off in his dinghy again, heading straight towards the nunjas’ canoe. “Geronimo!” he yelled, as much to encourage himself as scare the women, and he veered dramatically in front of them, cutting right across their bow. “Out of the way, you old buffoon!” bawled Prism. Captain Bob’s circled around and once again made for the canoe. Unfortunately, his inflatable was no match for the heavier craft, and when the two collided, it was Captain Bob who ended up in the water, his great weight dragging him down to the coral reef below. “Goodbye fool!” Prism cried exultantly, then turned her attention towards the Mersey May. “And now for the brats!”
On board, Joe had been turning and pushing all the knobs on the control panel, hoping against hope that one of them would bring the vessel to life. Meanwhile, Odi and the girl, having witnessed the fate of the Captain, were desperately trying to pull up the anchor, heaving with all their strength. “Hurry!” cried Odi. “Prism’s nearly here!”
Sure enough, the canoe was now alongside, and Prism was already clutching the steel ladder. “Prepare to invade!” she commanded her nunjas. “Staffs at the ready!” And each of the women stood up, weapons in hand ready to ascend.
But, no sooner had Prism got a foot on the first rung, the canoe capsized, catapulting all the nunjas into the sea. Moments later, a large red face emerged. “Sleep with the fishes!” sang Captain Bob and he swam towards the ladder, gripped Prism firmly by the foot and yanked her fiercely off the ladder.
Joe had finally found the right switch, starting the engine, just as Odi hauled the anchor back onto the deck, and everyone cheered to see their Captain, soggy but unbowed, beaming from ear to ear. “Put her to sea, Master Joe!” And the Mersey May set off into the sunset, its crew exhausted but triumphant.